Review Information
Game Reviewed Wario Ware: The Land of Diamont, by yoshis44, yoshis44
Review Author Roo
Created Aug 17 2021, 10:59 PM

General Commentary and Game Overview
"Wario Ware [sic]: The Land of Diamont [sic]" is a mediocre, sloppy platformer you probably shouldn't play unless you really, REALLY, REEEALLY like Wario and have also played approximately every other Wario game on this site.
Pros + It's mostly functional?
+ It's got more than, like, three levels
Cons - It's pretty unimaginative
- Collecting gems yields no real reward
- Some of the enemies function very haphazardly
4 / 10
The game is a platformer, and it's not exactly the worst one ever. You don't get caught on the scenery, you can usually jump whenever you want to, you won't randomly slide off the edges etc. Basically, it's "functional."

The main objective of the game, aside from reaching the goal, is collecting gems to add to your score, which doesn't really do anything. You don't even get the bog-standard Game Maker high score screen. Boo.

Every level is a single screen, and the level design (if you can call it that) is pretty haphazard. If you don't care about the score (which you probably shouldn't), you can oftentimes clear levels really quickly.

Your two main enemies are Goombas and Paratroopas. You can collect a "fire rock" to shoot fireballs that will kill your enemies (except when they go right through Paratroopas sometimes for some godforsaken reason). I also have to give props for the fact that you can actually stomp the Goombas, and then I have to immediately take those props away because you can't stomp the Paratroopas for some godforsaken reason. Basically, Paratroopas suck.
6 / 10
The graphics aren't exactly terrible (aside from the extremely stretched backgrounds and some of the menu graphics, perhaps), but they don't really "pop" very much either, and they're quite a mishmash of different styles (WL4, YI, SMASSMB3 etc.). Wario is also eternally in his walking animation, and I refuse to believe he would exert enough effort to jog in place.
5 / 10
The soundtrack is an assortment of mediocre midis, and a lot of the gameplay actions (like shooting) don't make a sound at all. Not much more to say.
Final Words
4 / 10
It's bad, but not the worst. Probably still worth avoiding, though.

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